So with that being said, we have new visiting hours at our house for monsters, ghouls, creepy crawly things, and the like. There will be no visits between the hours of 6PM and 7AM. None!

Also, if you would like to visit my girls, you will need to be pre-screened ahead of time by me. In other words, if you don’t look like this, you are out of luck.

Thanks.

A tired Dad2twins.

Related posts

• You must be kidding me…. (2)
• You know you want to hang with me. (1)
• Yes, I know I’m rubbing it in, but….. (5)

Related posts

• No related posts.

The Tooth Fairy

This is my version. (Note the bottle of whiskey to get me through the night of humiliation.)

Oh well, there is always next year…..

Related posts

• Thinking about Halloween already. (6)
• Our Halloween portrait – a little late. (1)
• Meet Thing 1 & Thing 2 aka The Farty Pants Twins. (5)

To all of the strip club searchers who find there way to my blog because I once wrote about my buddy and his bachelor party in Reno. Thanks. You keep making me money on Google ads. Thanks for supporting a Dad of twin girls.

Now DELURK!

Related posts

• You must be kidding me…. (2)
• You know you want to hang with me. (1)
• Yes, I know I’m rubbing it in, but….. (5)

It also works for the sellers of religion too!

Warning: this song may offend you. I don’t really care though.

Related posts

• No related posts.

Yes, you guessed it, it’s vacation planning time at Farty Pants World Headquarters.

Over the past couple of years, we have taken the kids to Europe to see family, and with family in tow to Tahiti, New Zealand and Hawaii. Yes, I know. I am not asking you to cry me a river. We are fortunate. But! All of these trips entailed getting on airplanes and traveling long distances so that we could enjoy whereever we were.

I love to travel. My wife loves to travel. Believe it or not, my kids love to travel. They are great fliers. They have been traveling since they were born. They think airports are fun. They love to drag their little carry on behind them through airports all over the world. They know that they have to take off their shoes going through security. They expect airport toilets to be yucky, and they can play on the airport people movers for hours waiting to board the next flight at 4 a.m. in the morning in some far off land. In short, they are travel veterans.

But I have laid down the law this year. No more airplanes for the rest of this year. I want to return to the simple life. Don’t get me wrong, I want to travel. I need to travel. I have lots to see. In a previous post I mentioned that I have been to a lot of places. Upon reflection, I realized I have not been to enough places in my own back yard. I’m speaking of the good ol’ U.S. of A.  So I have convinced my wife that this years vacation will be a driving vacation. She is thrilled. (Insert sarcastic looking facial expression here.)

It has taken some convincing. Alright, even some begging. No torture though. We in the nation of Farty Pants are above that. I got a bug up my ass that we should rent one of these and hit the road. I really want to go to Yellowstone.

I mapped it out on Google Maps and and it is doable. The kids can pee and poop as we drive. My wife promises me she will keep the car sickness to a minimum and we can travel in style. Our own self-contained mobile Farty Pants World Headquarters. I bet I can even blog about the trip as we drive.

So, stay tuned. If I can get one of those mobile beauties rented for a reasonable price and at a reasonable time, we will be doing my favorite past time. ROAD TRIP!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. I bet we are on a plane again before the year is out.

Related posts

• We are back from Hawaii and let me tell you… (1)
• Random thoughts from a random mind… (5)
• It’s participation time at Dad2twins.com (Where have you been?) (6)

Really? Should I be checking? Am I a bad Dad? I didn’t!

They are almost Four and have been potty trained since a very, very, early age.

Related posts

• Would you want this guy fathering your twins? (2)
• We now have gardeners too. (0)
• We got creative and this is what we made. (0)

I have a secret weapon though. His name is Sheafe. He is my best friend and he is Mr. Travel. If there are deal to be found, he will find it. Hey Sheafe, no pressure.

Now, whether we actually go or not will be another thing.

Related posts

• Um.. no Daddy. (3)
• Random thoughts from a random mind… (5)
• Deep into summer and all that it brings… (1)

“No we are not going to Hawaii today.”

“No we are not going to Hawaii today.”

“No we are not going to Hawaii today.”

“No we are not going to Hawaii today.”

“No we are not going to Hawaii today.”

“No we are not going to Hawaii today.”

“No we are not going to Hawaii today.”

“No we are not going to Hawaii today.”

It’s been like this for a couple of weeks now. Make it stop! Yes, I know it’s my fault. You don’t have to rub it in. I’m coming to you for advice.

MAKE     IT       STOP!

My kids are driving me crazy. They are driving my wife crazy. They are driving the neighbors crazy.

NEVER….. EVER…. tell your kids you are going on vacation to a swimming pool in a warm climate in winter more than 5 minutes before the plane leaves. Trust me. You will thank me later.

Oh and….. Yes. I know we suck. But we go through this every year don’t we.

Peace.

Related posts

• Vacation, what vacation? (2)
• We are back from Hawaii and let me tell you… (1)
• Random thoughts from a random mind… (5)

I don’t know where this blog went wrong? It started as a blog about my twin girls. Their adventures, and my exploits as their father. That’s it. It was my exploits.

That’s where I went wrong.

You see, I was invited to the bachelor party of a friend of mine. We live a couple of hours drive from Reno, NV.  He decided he wanted his bachelor party in Reno and I was charged with making it happen. I posted a blog entry asking anyone if they knew of any good strip clubs in Reno. His request, my question. In fact, that was the title of the blog post I think. It was an honest mistake. I trusted that you dad bloggers, and maybe even a few mommy bloggers could hook me up with some good advice so we could send my buddy off. Looking back I should have done a Google search and called it a day.

My bad.

Seriously. Who knew, a year later that most of the search visitors who land on the site come to my blog posting asking about Reno Strip Clubs. You need proof? I have posted a days worth of google keyword searches below.

As you can see 8 out of the 10 searches are for Reno Strip Clubs or some version of those three words. Needless to say, no one really comes to this site to hear about my adventures as a father of twin girls. They come here looking for information on Reno Strip Clubs.

This post will only add to the amount of traffic I get. I just hope they click on the Google ads so I can make a few bucks. Hey strip club hunters, you hearing me. Click those ads. —————->

Oh, and here is a link for those strip clubs you were looking for:

http://www.google.com/search?q=reno+strip+clubs&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-aor

or this one:

http://www.clubzone.com/c1/Reno/Strip_Clubs.html

You can thank me now.

-Dad2twins (Past Reno strip club visitor)

Related posts

• People I would like to meet (0)
• 44 (0)
• We are locking down the house in case of a prison break. (0)