Christmas is a special time of year. Not because of it’s religious significance. Which I agree, for many, is what the holiday is centered around. I am sometimes jealous of those who wrap themselves in the Christmas spirit by feeling the strength of their religion as a warm Christmas embrace. But it must be said, I am not a religious person. I never really have been. Okay, there was that time in high school when I was all about church. I went several times a week. I left the church when they wanted silent donations. (Code word for cash and checks, not change.) Oh, and there was the girl. She was the real reason I went anyway. I know, I’ll burn in hell. It is the risk I take.

So, we got a little off topic.

Christmas is a special time of year for me, and not because of religion, but because of family. The other significant reason to celebrate the best holiday of the year. We have traditions in our family. We have always had traditions. Before I was married, our family celebrated Christmas with a definite Norwegian bias. We are Norwegians on my Mom’s side of the family. My Grandfather was a good Norseman. We are proud Norwegians. Well okay, stop. I need to back that statement up a bit. My Grandfather was a proud Norwegian. I am more Norwegian lite. The reason I make this blasphemous statement is because there are two things that will not enter my mouth that are staples of the Norwegian Christmas diet. At least for us Laplanders.  1. Rommegrot and 2. Lutefisk. In my family, both of these involve sour cream. And let me just say that Rommegrot is the worst tasting dish I have ever had the pleasure of throwing up. Those crazy Norwegians think you will like it better if you put an almond in one of the Rommegrot bowls. The tradition goes something like this, the person who finds the almond gets a special gift that year. I call bullshit on this one. All I ever got was an appointment with the porcelain god and I DID find the almond one year. Come to think of it, it was the ONLY year I ate that crap. Special gift forgotten.  I had to hand in my full blown Norwegian card for a Norwegian lite model after that.

Thank god I married a German. Now we have brought some of the German traditions into our house during the Christmas holiday. We celebrate the Advent with the kids. Okay, not really. They get Advent calendars. Close enough…right? Oh and we celebrate Sankt Nikolaus day on December 6th. (Look it up).  We also have some German goodies to eat. And much to my dismay, we even open a few gifts on Christmas Eve. Contrary to my wife’s belief ( and probably yours) I believe Christmas is actually on Christmas day. I know. A novel idea. My wife and I have this discussion every year. She thinks Christmas is on Christmas Eve and I think it is Christmas day. Back and forth we go. Where it ends…… So we have found a compromise after several years of marriage. We do a little gift giving on both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Settled! The baby Jesus would be so proud of us.

So Christmas is special in our own little way. It has become a melting pot of traditions, both longstanding and newer. We eat Norwegian rullepolse on Christmas morning along with a Swedish tea ring. A shout out to the Swedes. Our Norwegian next door neighbors. We also eat Jimmy Dean sausage. A shout out to America! Bring on the pork. We do a lot of eating at Christmas time, and drinking.

Wait, come to think of it, I am part Irish too!  Where is my Guinness!

Today I find myself thinking about you, my dear blog. When I first started writing the Dad2twins blog, I was fresh into parenthood. The kids were barely born and I was in utter and complete shock that I was a new father of not one, but two beautiful little girls. I dubbed them the Farty Pants Twins. I am Dad2twins. Together we are this blog.

The Farty Pants Twins are doing great. We continue to feed them. They grow. They want more food. We feed them again. They grow so more. A vicious cycle. The same cannot be said for this blog. If this blog was one of my girls, I would be in jail for child abandonment. Or worse, starvation or murder. So I count my lucky stars this is only the outlet for my parental rants. My ego. My alter ego actually.

So here I am. Still writing. Thinking about where to go with this blog. Do I keep doing what I’ve been doing? Do I ramp it back up again? There is so much to say and see and do. If you follow me on facebook you will know I am addicted to that new avenue of expression. For the rest of you who are not “friended” I need to think about you as well. As if you care. Do you care? I hope so. I actually do care. Really, I do.

Anyway, enough of the stream of consciousness. I promise my new years resolution will be to think about this blog more often. Hey, I’m a month and a half early on the resolution. That has got to be a good thing. Right?

Happy Thanksgiving everyone. I am thankful you still read this.

Next stop…..College. I guess I better start saving some money now. Oh wait, they have dual citizenship in Germany. College is free there. Pack your bags girls, your going to college in Germany.

That is, of course, assuming we make it through kindergarten.

Last night was a BAD night. At 2AM my daughter woke me up because she was visited by a monster. She cannot describe the monster because she was to traumatized by the visit to describe the drive by. Needless to say, the visit didn’t just effect her, but dragged me into the dream as well.

So with that being said, we have new visiting hours at our house for monsters, ghouls, creepy crawly things, and the like. There will be no visits between the hours of 6PM and 7AM. None!

Also, if you would like to visit my girls, you will need to be pre-screened ahead of time by me. In other words, if you don’t look like this, you are out of luck.

Thanks.

A tired Dad2twins.

What is a Dad2twins to do?

I know, go visit Christine over at thebeanblog.com. She just finished thirty posts in thirty days. At least there is something to read over there.

I’m ashamed.

The Tooth Fairy

This is my version. (Note the bottle of whiskey to get me through the night of humiliation.)

Oh well, there is always next year…..

It’s really quite funny and sweet all at the same time. Reese thinks it’s silly.

It also works for the sellers of religion too!

Warning: this song may offend you. I don’t really care though.

With the economy in the crapper, we are all having to tighten our belts a little bit. Last night we went to dinner and found out we just missed the kids eat free time window for the Farty Pants Twins. That got me to thinking. Can you smell my brain? Anyway, where else can kids eat free? Here is my list I was able to compile. It is most definitely incomplete, so leave a comment on places you know kids can eat for free or discounted and I will keep the comments open so people can see the list as it grows. At some point in the future I will update the list with all of your comments and links to those restaurants (assuming they have a website.)

So go out there and enjoy a meal out of the house. Just do it wisely.

Denny’s

At some Denny’s restaurants, kids eat free on Tuesday and Saturday nights. You can receive up to two free kids meals for every one regularly priced adults meal. This is perfect for a single mother or father with two kids! The Denny’s deal accommodates kids ages 10 and younger.

Lone Star Steakhouse

Lone Star restaurants embrace an authentic roadhouse theme and serve mesquite-grilled steaks, which are hand-cut fresh daily at each restaurant. Our menu includes “Texas-sized” portions of food, including a variety of combinations that are sure to please. With daily specials for lunch and dinner, a variety of appetizers and desserts and a full-service bar, Lone Star is a destination restaurant.

The Lone Star Steakhouse chain has a special kids eat free deal for the whole day on Tuesdays. Up to two kids can get a free meal off of the kids menu when one adult buys an entrée meal.

Perkins

Perkins is the leading operator and franchisor of nearly 500 full-service family dining restaurants located primarily in the Midwest, Florida and Pennsylvania.

At Perkins Restaurants, which are located all over the country, kids can get a free cookie and free drink with their kids meal.

Baja Fresh

Baja Fresh is excellent, fresh mexican food. Here is waht they say: It takes a lot of hard work and dedication to bring our customers the Baja Fresh® experience. Fresh ingredients, expert preparation, clean cheerful surroundings, genuine smiles, value for the dollar, and prompt courteous service are a tall order to fill…and our people do it, day in and day out.

At our local Baja Fresh, kids eat free on Wednesdays at 4PM. Check with your local Baja Fresh Franchise to find out what deals they offer.

Here are some great links to other websites that show you “Kids eat free” deals.

Coupon Diva’s – Excellent site showing deals by day of the week and restaurant.

Kid’s Eat Free – A great site to search for deals by state.

Kid’s Meal Deals – Another site to find that kid’s meal deal.

Kid’s Eat Free – Once again, a great compilation of deals for kid’s meals.

Good luck and good eating on the cheap.

-Dad2twins

Yes, you guessed it, it’s vacation planning time at Farty Pants World Headquarters.

Over the past couple of years, we have taken the kids to Europe to see family, and with family in tow to Tahiti, New Zealand and Hawaii. Yes, I know. I am not asking you to cry me a river. We are fortunate. But! All of these trips entailed getting on airplanes and traveling long distances so that we could enjoy whereever we were.

I love to travel. My wife loves to travel. Believe it or not, my kids love to travel. They are great fliers. They have been traveling since they were born. They think airports are fun. They love to drag their little carry on behind them through airports all over the world. They know that they have to take off their shoes going through security. They expect airport toilets to be yucky, and they can play on the airport people movers for hours waiting to board the next flight at 4 a.m. in the morning in some far off land. In short, they are travel veterans.

But I have laid down the law this year. No more airplanes for the rest of this year. I want to return to the simple life. Don’t get me wrong, I want to travel. I need to travel. I have lots to see. In a previous post I mentioned that I have been to a lot of places. Upon reflection, I realized I have not been to enough places in my own back yard. I’m speaking of the good ol’ U.S. of A.  So I have convinced my wife that this years vacation will be a driving vacation. She is thrilled. (Insert sarcastic looking facial expression here.)

It has taken some convincing. Alright, even some begging. No torture though. We in the nation of Farty Pants are above that. I got a bug up my ass that we should rent one of these and hit the road. I really want to go to Yellowstone.

I mapped it out on Google Maps and and it is doable. The kids can pee and poop as we drive. My wife promises me she will keep the car sickness to a minimum and we can travel in style. Our own self-contained mobile Farty Pants World Headquarters. I bet I can even blog about the trip as we drive.

So, stay tuned. If I can get one of those mobile beauties rented for a reasonable price and at a reasonable time, we will be doing my favorite past time. ROAD TRIP!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. I bet we are on a plane again before the year is out.