Jet is really a wonderful cat. We rescued her from a terrible home environment of torture and abuse. She spent the first 6 months at my house under my bed. A true cat ghost. But there in lies the problem. I think she really wants to spend the rest of her life thanking me for that rescue.

Keep in mind, she hates the other animals in the house. But not me. I cannot sit down on the couch and she rushes over to get pets. Yells at me, NONE STOP! Won’t leave me alone. I give her pets. She takes the pets. She wants……MORE PETS. Jeez. Leave me alone. I want to just spend some time watching T.V. without being harassed non-fricking-stop. LEAVE ME ALONE. You got your pets. I accept your thanks. Yes, you are a happy cat. I understand that. But, I have something to tell you…… I AM NOT A HAPPY OWNER. I’m taking out a restraining order on you. 5 feet away from me from here on out buddy. Not one paw closer. I mean it.

At least tonight.

Last night was a BAD night. At 2AM my daughter woke me up because she was visited by a monster. She cannot describe the monster because she was to traumatized by the visit to describe the drive by. Needless to say, the visit didn’t just effect her, but dragged me into the dream as well.

So with that being said, we have new visiting hours at our house for monsters, ghouls, creepy crawly things, and the like. There will be no visits between the hours of 6PM and 7AM. None!

Also, if you would like to visit my girls, you will need to be pre-screened ahead of time by me. In other words, if you don’t look like this, you are out of luck.

Thanks.

A tired Dad2twins.

What is a Dad2twins to do?

I know, go visit Christine over at thebeanblog.com. She just finished thirty posts in thirty days. At least there is something to read over there.

I’m ashamed.

The Tooth Fairy

This is my version. (Note the bottle of whiskey to get me through the night of humiliation.)

Oh well, there is always next year…..

To all of the strip club searchers who find there way to my blog because I once wrote about my buddy and his bachelor party in Reno. Thanks. You keep making me money on Google ads. Thanks for supporting a Dad of twin girls.

Now DELURK!

I mean, wassup with Kanye people? Must have been the Hennessy. Or his ego?

Poor little Taylor Swift. She finally got her apology.

It also works for the sellers of religion too!

Warning: this song may offend you. I don’t really care though.

With the economy in the crapper, we are all having to tighten our belts a little bit. Last night we went to dinner and found out we just missed the kids eat free time window for the Farty Pants Twins. That got me to thinking. Can you smell my brain? Anyway, where else can kids eat free? Here is my list I was able to compile. It is most definitely incomplete, so leave a comment on places you know kids can eat for free or discounted and I will keep the comments open so people can see the list as it grows. At some point in the future I will update the list with all of your comments and links to those restaurants (assuming they have a website.)

So go out there and enjoy a meal out of the house. Just do it wisely.

Denny’s

At some Denny’s restaurants, kids eat free on Tuesday and Saturday nights. You can receive up to two free kids meals for every one regularly priced adults meal. This is perfect for a single mother or father with two kids! The Denny’s deal accommodates kids ages 10 and younger.

Lone Star Steakhouse

Lone Star restaurants embrace an authentic roadhouse theme and serve mesquite-grilled steaks, which are hand-cut fresh daily at each restaurant. Our menu includes “Texas-sized” portions of food, including a variety of combinations that are sure to please. With daily specials for lunch and dinner, a variety of appetizers and desserts and a full-service bar, Lone Star is a destination restaurant.

The Lone Star Steakhouse chain has a special kids eat free deal for the whole day on Tuesdays. Up to two kids can get a free meal off of the kids menu when one adult buys an entrée meal.

Perkins

Perkins is the leading operator and franchisor of nearly 500 full-service family dining restaurants located primarily in the Midwest, Florida and Pennsylvania.

At Perkins Restaurants, which are located all over the country, kids can get a free cookie and free drink with their kids meal.

Baja Fresh

Baja Fresh is excellent, fresh mexican food. Here is waht they say: It takes a lot of hard work and dedication to bring our customers the Baja Fresh® experience. Fresh ingredients, expert preparation, clean cheerful surroundings, genuine smiles, value for the dollar, and prompt courteous service are a tall order to fill…and our people do it, day in and day out.

At our local Baja Fresh, kids eat free on Wednesdays at 4PM. Check with your local Baja Fresh Franchise to find out what deals they offer.

Here are some great links to other websites that show you “Kids eat free” deals.

Coupon Diva’s – Excellent site showing deals by day of the week and restaurant.

Kid’s Eat Free – A great site to search for deals by state.

Kid’s Meal Deals – Another site to find that kid’s meal deal.

Kid’s Eat Free – Once again, a great compilation of deals for kid’s meals.

Good luck and good eating on the cheap.

-Dad2twins

Yes, you guessed it, it’s vacation planning time at Farty Pants World Headquarters.

Over the past couple of years, we have taken the kids to Europe to see family, and with family in tow to Tahiti, New Zealand and Hawaii. Yes, I know. I am not asking you to cry me a river. We are fortunate. But! All of these trips entailed getting on airplanes and traveling long distances so that we could enjoy whereever we were.

I love to travel. My wife loves to travel. Believe it or not, my kids love to travel. They are great fliers. They have been traveling since they were born. They think airports are fun. They love to drag their little carry on behind them through airports all over the world. They know that they have to take off their shoes going through security. They expect airport toilets to be yucky, and they can play on the airport people movers for hours waiting to board the next flight at 4 a.m. in the morning in some far off land. In short, they are travel veterans.

But I have laid down the law this year. No more airplanes for the rest of this year. I want to return to the simple life. Don’t get me wrong, I want to travel. I need to travel. I have lots to see. In a previous post I mentioned that I have been to a lot of places. Upon reflection, I realized I have not been to enough places in my own back yard. I’m speaking of the good ol’ U.S. of A.  So I have convinced my wife that this years vacation will be a driving vacation. She is thrilled. (Insert sarcastic looking facial expression here.)

It has taken some convincing. Alright, even some begging. No torture though. We in the nation of Farty Pants are above that. I got a bug up my ass that we should rent one of these and hit the road. I really want to go to Yellowstone.

I mapped it out on Google Maps and and it is doable. The kids can pee and poop as we drive. My wife promises me she will keep the car sickness to a minimum and we can travel in style. Our own self-contained mobile Farty Pants World Headquarters. I bet I can even blog about the trip as we drive.

So, stay tuned. If I can get one of those mobile beauties rented for a reasonable price and at a reasonable time, we will be doing my favorite past time. ROAD TRIP!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. I bet we are on a plane again before the year is out.