Yesterday was a hellish day. I drove 220 miles to a potential new clients location in the beautiful back country of Mendocino County California. Wow the drive was awesome. Beautiful Redwoods, bubbling streams, gorgeous valley’s, ton’s of birds, some elk and one dead deer. Yes dead. I killed it. It jumped out in front of my car and I killed it. Not on purpose. I was passing a bike rider who must have startled it and it jumped up from the ravine on the side of the road right into the path of my car. Before I knew it, it bounced off the front right corner of my car and fell back down the ravine. Dead. I stopped. I got out and looked down the ravine. Yup dead. I looked at my car. Yup ruined. I looked at the lady bike rider. Yup shocked. And then she looked at me and yelled; “You killed it! You killed that deer.”

I looked at her and said; actually my car killed the deer and I think you are an accessory to the crime. Your bike startled it. you made it jump in from of my car. At this point she said nothing. I looked at my car again and noticed the blood all along the side of the car. I looked at the bike rider and I think she had blood on her outfit.

At this point I asked if she was okay. She repeated her previous statement to me about me killing the deer. At this point I got back in the car and drove off. I didn’t want to miss the appointment I just drove 200 miles to get to.

It gets better people.

I called my Wife. She thought I should have called the Police. Why? I have no idea. I could not have reached the deer in the ravine if I had wanted to. It was dead. I killed it. My car killed it with the help of the bike rider. Time to move on.

I get to my appointment and my cell phone rings. I figure it is the cops. Nope, my assistant calling to tell me the appointment is canceled. The person I have just driven 200 mile to see is sick. They just called to tell me. WTF!!!!!

Since I am friggin in the parking lot of the company as I get this call, I get out and go to the office. I tell them I HAD an appointment to see so and so and they say….. wait for it….. oh she just left. NO WAY!!!!! I leave my information and tell them I will CALL her in the next week to discuss what I came 200 friggin miles to talk to her about.

Did I mention this was a brewery? Well I tell her my sad story, deer murder and drive time etc, etc. and she tells me to go over to the visitor center and have a free beer and pizza. Excellent idea I say. I walk across the parking lot and go to open the door of the visitor center and the door does not open. Sign reads CLOSED FOR WINTER.

SHIT!!!!

I drive home.